Saturday, January 2, 2010

To Freedom

Such an abused idea. Who doesn't want it?
This is why I want it.
I want to live just a little more free each day.
To love when I want to love. To cry when I need to.
So each act each moment allows me to be me. So I let myself feel the way I feel.
So my heart is my mind and my mind my heart.
So I can speak knowing the pain it will cause me. but a pain that makes me feel human and alive.
Do I sound morbid? Who knows, maybe freedom is a morbid idea. But then again, it isn't.

It's Fearlessness.

From all I am afraid of.

of pain of wrong of disappointing of consequences of rape of embarassment of mockery of judgment

but also freedom from.

I love the skirt. I won't wear the suit.

And that is why I want to live just a little more free each day.
To be me. Not you, you or you. Me.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

This one's for me

I hate being treated like a girl
I hate having my heavy bags picked up by boys
I hate being escorted home late at night
I hate being judged for drinking
I hate having to drink beer out of a wine glass coz I’m wearing a salwar kameez when my cousins wear suits and drink beer out of a bottle
But I won’t wear the suit

I hate being stared at when I wear a short skirt
I hate being started at
I love being flattered
It’s always fun to be hit on

I hate being told I’m a girl
I hate being reminded I’m a girl
I hate being aware that I’m a girl at every living moment
I love being pampered
I hate being taken for granted that I want to be taken care of because I’m a girl
But I love the skirt, I won’t wear the suit

I hate being told to do something because I should
I hate having to explain myself to people I don’t care for
I hate having to explain myself to people I do
I hate being treated like I have no feelings
I cry

I hate being helpless
I hate having to stand and watch
I hate being scared

I hate being reminded about what I never forgot

I hate having to listen when I don't want to

I hate peer pressure
I love being left alone
I hate being uncared for
I hate being put on a pedestal
I hate when my world is treated as a faraway land
I love my world